Saturday, August 15, 2015

Ali Baba and the Forty... Thieves

So rumor has it another collection is in the works. That's right, after a two year hiatus, EbR is back, and is coming out with a new collection. The picture is taken, the pages are almost full, and things will be good to go in just a few more stories.

I'll post all about that. Maybe I'll get lucky and one of you will even buy a copy.

Today is one of the last stories that will make it into the collection. The other story will be tied to the cover shot, and that story will NOT be posted here. So to read it... you have to buy the book.

But for today, this is a great request, and a great little fairy tale to talk about.

Coins, cocks, and conversation

Ali takes a deep breath, shifting in her seat. Her hands are clenched in her lap to stop them from shaking too much. There's no good reason for her to be this nervous; there's only the one guy sitting across from her. And he's smiling. She knows him. She trusts him.

“Do you know who Scheherazade was?” he asks her. Before she can answer, he continues. “She was a storyteller. She had to tell a new story every night to avoid being killed by a bored sultan. As long as she had another story, he let her live. She's sort of the narrator in 1001 Arabian nights. It takes that long for her to make him fall in love with her and make him spare her life.”

He waves a dismissive hand “or something like that. Anyway. 1001 days. That's almost three straight years. Can you imagine? Telling a story every night. All night. And having to come up with it on the fly.” he shakes his head. “I think your jaw would get tired. Any time you use your mouth for the same thing for hours on end, it'll get tired. But I'm guessing you already know that.” He smirks at her.

The silence stretches for a while, until finally she nods, wringing her hands together.

“One of those stories that Sheherazade told was Ali Baba and the forty thieves. I bet that one is a bit personal for you, isn't it? In the story, Ali Baba steals from some thieves. When they catch him, can you imagine what terrible things they must have done to him? He found a way into their secret lair, and he stole from them. Twice.” He shakes his head. “It's bad. I'll bet they took their time, and took turns, with him. Don't you think? Forty men all torturing one poor fool who made the mistake of stealing from them.”

He puts a single coin on the table between them. It's a golden coin, only worth a dollar. But that's not the point.

“Forty men. One victim.”

Ali looks at the coin, knowing what it means. All she has to do is pick it up. That's all it will take.

“But let's not think about that,” he says, leaning back again. “Let's talk about everyone's favorite subject: sex. There are lots of kinds of sex. Lots of positions. Which leads me to another book. I'm sure you've heard of the Karma Sutra? Most people have.”

He tosses a second coin onto the table, identical to the first.

He looks at her again until she nods. As Ali opens her mouth to answer, he holds up a hand.

“No need to talk just yet,” he says. “You should save your jaw strength.” He smiles, tenting his fingers in his lap.

Her eyes settle back on the coins as he continues. “Most people haven't actually read it, of course. But it has this reputation. The reputation that it's basically a sex manual, with hundreds of different positions. And there's truth to that. But there's also a story.” he sighs. “But you don't care about the story, do you? That's fine. I wanted to talk about the positions anyway.”

A third gold coin hits the table, and Ali jumps at the clinking sound.

“Most people think that a woman has only three places where she can be fucked. The mouth,” he smiles. Then he gestures dismissively at her lower body, “the pussy and the ass. Of course, some people are smart enough to remember that women have hands too. So that's potentially five cocks all at the same time. Takes a bit of maneuvering, but it's possible.”

He holds up a fourth coin, rolling it down the fingers of his hand. It looks almost hypnotic with the grace of his movements.

“But there are more,” he says. “The Karma Sutra helps expand the mind, and makes people realize that if the breasts are large enough, you can press them together and create another hole to fuck.”

Another coin hits the table, and he rolls one down each hand now as he watches her fidget.

“I suppose we could get creative, too,” he says. “The gap next to your big toes, for example. That's two more positions for cocks.”

Clunk. Clunk. Two more coins.

“But do we really want to go to seven cocks? I'm not entirely sure. And I don't know how much fun it would be for someone to fuck your feet.” He takes out another coin, spinning it on the table to come to rest with the other seven. “Then again, some people like that kind of thing. Feet are a popular fetish. What do you think the odds are that at least two in forty would have it?” He scratches his chin, his smile turning even more mischievous.

“The other thing some people do is let more than one man stand by her head, so she can pass her mouth back and forth between cocks. Or then can even try putting two cocks in your mouth at the same time.” He shrugs. “Which works, but many men are uncomfortable with. You'd have to do a very good job sucking and licking both cocks for them not to think about their petty homophobia.”

She clenches her hands to stop from shaking.

“So let's review,” he says, leaning over the table. “One in each hand.” he moves two of the coins to the side into their own pile “One between your breasts. That's three.” He gestures to the new pile of three coins. Then he slides two more over. “Two more with your feet. One in your ass, one in your pussy.” One by one, he adds another coin.

Then he smiles at her again and puts his fingers over the last two coins, sliding them slowly over to the pile. “And let us not forget the mouth,” he says.

“Nine coins. Nine cocks. All at the same time.”
He stacks the coins together into a neat pile, rising up off the table in a small pillar. “1001 stories would take almost 3 years. How long do you think it would take to fuck forty men?” He holds up a hand. “For a normal person, I mean. Someone who was NOT a raging slut.” He gestures to the pile of coins. “How long to do it one at a time, without one night stands?”

“C-could take forever,” she says.

“How often is too often to have a new partner?” he asks. “Again, for a normal person?”

Ali shrugs, blushing as she looks at the coins. “I don't know,” she says.

“No, you wouldn't, would you?” He sighs. “Let's say one a month, then. One every four weeks, in that search for Mister right. Forty months. That's almost three and a half years.

“That's like telling 1001 tales.” He shakes his head and gestures back to the thick stack of coins. “Of course, nine at a time means you'd be done by the fifth round. Even if you did them one a month, you'd be done shy of half a year. That's not bad.”

Then he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a stack of nine more coins, setting them next to the first.

“Two in one day and you'd be almost halfway there.”

He sets two more stacks down.

Then counts out four more coins.

“This is it,” he says. “Forty coins. Forty cocks. Forty thieves.” He looks at Ali for a few seconds, then chuckles. “Of course, if this was prostitution, you'd be the cheapest whore in the world. A dollar each. That would be... pathetic at best. That's not why the coins are here.”

He sets a glass on the table and begins to drop the coins in one at a time. “I just wanted to have something to demonstrate the endeavor you're thinking about. Something to show you just how much we're talking about. Just how many guys. How many cocks.”

Clink. Clink. Clink.

“I imagine you'll be very sore.”

Clink. Clink. Clink.

“I hope you've planned for that.”

Clink. Clink. Clink.

He sighs and leans forward, looking Ali right in the eyes. “What's most important is that you know how to make it stop. Have you ever been skydiving?”

Ali shakes her head. “This is the wildest thing I've even thought of.”

Clink. Clink. He smiles.

“When you skydive, the first thing they teach you is to arch your back, and in fact your whole body. Spread your hands, push your shoulders back, lift up your feet, the whole nine. It's a pretty distinctive stance, and not one you get into naturally.”


“They tell you to practice it in bed. To try it a few times so your body gets used to it. But you know all about practicing things in bed.”


“The problem is knowing when you've practiced enough. At what point have you done it enough to know you can do it on command? At what point have you built up the stamina?” He smirks.

Clink. Clink.

“Anyway, that pose is important. Because it's impossible to miss. So you need to practice that pose. We'll have you do it once before we start, all stretched out and showing your body off to us. Probably make you hold it a few seconds to get a good look.”


“But after that, if you do it again, we'll stop. Immediately.” He looks her right in the eye, drawing in her attention with utter sincerity. “Okay?”

Ali takes a deep breath as he drops the rest of the coins into the glass in a torrent that sets butterflies off in her stomach. She nods. “Okay,” she says. “I- I can do that.”

“Excellent,” he says, standing up and offering her a hand.

She stands somewhat shakily, and he gives her a pleasant smile.

“Now then,” he says, taking her to the other room and helping her settle in.

“Open Sesame.”

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